Brown Bag: Meeting Others
Realistically, the experience here in DC has been surreal. I feel as though, since I am writing this May 2nd, 2023, and the ending of my internship is May 6th, I am fast approaching the moment that I leave everything I’ve since learned about being a part of the Department of State in a momentary lapse of stasis. Since my last submission in my blog, I have had so much happen to me. I am beginning to feel a little bit more secluded from those that I previously associated with, and the focus of being in DC, though nice, is to finally return back to the happy environment I am so familiar with.
Florida will be a nice change of pace. With the exception of how beautiful and enticing the buzz of DC is, Florida is beckoning for me to return to its crisp white sandy beaches and the warmth of the sun’s rays as it reflects against my body. The Florida sun, as opposed to being here in DC, is reminiscent of the warm embrace of a much needed hug when you step outside. It could also be equated to Satan’s armpit when stepping out onto the pickup lane at the Orlando airport with the first experience of true Florida humidity, but I digress.
To recap these last few weeks, much has happened. The most memorable would have been the people I have met here in DC. Through minor conversation I have ran into great companions that are equally searching for an escape from reality, and just looking to get out a bit to enjoy themselves while their journey proceeds them. I have made a great many connections, but I have also lost a great many as well. I believe that for me, it is easy to deal with things in a very Stoic method, in the sense that just because you feel emotions, does not mean that your actions must be dictated by them, no matter how good the feeling is. This sense of reality is differing from a lot of people since relationships in the short-run typically are not given enough credit for their impact.
For example, I might enjoy a short-term connection with someone knowing that I will have to say goodbye with no further implication that I will see or speak to this person at all in the future. Some people get this, and some people have never been in the situation, so communication needs to be made abundantly a priority in order to ensure emotional security for all parties involved. In a case of which I still regret today, my feelings of distance caused me to feel separated from the reality of what was around me, and this was conflicting the flurry of emotions that I wished to fulfill in the future with someone I could not have physically (essentially, long-distance sucks). Though I wish that I was still connected in some capacity to this individual, would it hurt more in the grand scheme to chase, or to admit that a shift of interest was needed to fight the feeling of not being able to truly obtain what we both wanted? Who knows? I just know that the feeling of missing someone sucks.
Memorable Encounters
Whether at a bar, at a social event, or even on the metro, there have been profound moments of interpersonal interaction that can spark up some of the best adventures. There have been memorable rendezvous that wouldn’t have happened if it wasn’t for some effect of outbound energy that caused two people to match each other on a resonant level. These interactions only need to happen for a very short time, but the effect of the lasting memory will be very powerful indeed. Some of the encounters that I have had the pleasure of sharing has allowed me to open up potential opportunities of doing something that I previously wouldn’t have considered, such as going to some event, or partaking in an activity that I usually would find myself at an avoidance more or less because of a lack of confidence in those activities. It is typically the person or people that I am with that makes all the difference, which normally is the case in most of life.
The important thing to note; however, is that even though the lifestyle of a rolling stone may seem appealing, the livelihood of this method of living can be very lonely if you’re only chasing the next person to spend time with in your adventure. As I have continued to learn and grow and reflect on the lessons that are important for me to understand, appreciating being with yourself is more important than any amount of desire for attention from anyone. Otherwise, if you only care about who you share it with, you will never be satisfied. Yes, the world is a massive place with people all over the world that are unprepared for people like you or I to just barge into their life, but it happens. To prevent catastrophe it is imperative to set the goals and guidelines down with proper communication before the serotonin and dopamine begin to wire a dependency on an imminent stranger once again.
When meeting people, It is hard to dive into a conversation about what is necessary to keep emotions uninvolved unless you both are in similar situations (i.e., traveling, backpacking, work trip, etc.) but it is good practice to learn how to reject yourself from potential pleasurable interactions and to deal with rejection of knowing that continuing any form of conversation with strangers will be enfeebling of willpower, and requires a lot of energy, especially to reject your emotions.
Appreciate Your Encounters: The Sickness
On the metro one day as I was returning from work, I overheard a conversation in Russian behind me. As I looked around, I found the gaze of a Russian goddess by the name of Lada. With a light strawberry blonde hair color, radiant blue eyes and a robustly beautiful face as if chiseled from marble, I had in one fell swoop the opportunity not only to impress, but to practice genuinely the Russian that I know in my heart I have been neglecting.
The rizz, thankfully worked in my favor. As we arrived closer to our destination we realized we both were on the same stop. We spoke in Russian and English and discussed how she is leaving DC in one day. We made a plan to meet up before we parted ways and within the next night we did. Boardroom VA was a priority choice, who doesn’t like to get drunk and play board games? We spoke about a plethora of categories ranging from the past to the future and personal things about ourselves. The interaction was great. Unfortunately, she had to go back to the state of Georgia because her study abroad program was calling her back so that she could prepare for her return to Russia.
Then days later after she had left back to Georgia, she tells me that the interaction was so amazing that she decided to come back to DC just to see me and spend another weekend here. I was flabbergasted but incredibly complimented.
well, get this-
I ended up feeling a bit rough on Friday, and Lada is supposed to arrive back in DC on Saturday. I become so under the weather with the most debilitating case of bacterial tonsillitis that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. Imagine swallowing razor blades at every gulp of even what minimal saliva you have in your mouth. She arrives Saturday and this experience is whooping my ass, so I attempt as best as I can to go to Boardroom VA once again to have a drink and play games. I didn’t have much energy so I was happy to just be able to talk. Sunday comes around and I wake up with the worst inflammation of my tonsils that I have ever had. But in the case that I have a guest who spent money to come back to DC and traveled for numerous hours to get here, I had to force myself to feel fine. We did end up having a great day: going on a walk to Georgetown, riding bikes, then going to see the Arlington Cemetery with the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. The entire time was fantastic but as soon as the cemetery closed, and the sun began to set, the heat removed itself from my body. I was trembling attempting to make it home, with no energy in me to put one foot in front of the other. I struggled to make it back home and with each begrudgingly meandered step, I found my way into my bed. With 6 blankets and sheets, my body was convulsing in shivers. Lada brought me tea.
“Why is it so, so cold?” I kept asking repeatedly while I shivered under all the blankets.
“It’s not, its really warm in here” she would reply, putting her hand on my head and telling me I felt like a radiator.
I was going to debate about heading to the ER in the morning, as I was too cold to get up and I would go before I went to work. Better judgement; however, called that I go to the ER that night, the Sunday night that Lada was here for and was her last night in DC for good. I felt terrible, not just because of how sick I was but because I felt as though I failed as a host. I went alone to the ER, leaving Lada at the apartment because she has a thing against hospitals. Over the next few hours, from 8:30pm until 12:30am, I was IV’d, given high dosage painkillers, and had multiple tests done on me, all of which came back negative. They broke my fever, thank God, of 101.9 degrees, and I finally started feeling like myself again. When I got back to my apartment I was exhausted and felt like shit for having left Lada, but she did the most incredible thing, she didn’t care. She was happy to see me feeling better and that I was actually able to in some capacity survive. I feel like that’s a basic necessity but to travel with limited money, being only in an area for a few days to see someone who leaves you to go to the ER for hours, I am sure it would perturb someone somewhere, but not Lada. Her support showed to me why making meaningful connections are important, even if they are short-lived.
She left the next morning after we got breakfast and she returns to Russia after the internship ends. But even in that small interaction of a few days, it goes to show that there is a lot of time and energy out there in the world that can be given to total strangers if the vibes are right. In life, there will be plenty of companions, friends, romances and just plain old acquaintances to make and appreciate, so know what you have in front of you because they will be memories for the rest of your days.